“Are we a family that cares for and supports each other? Or are we a group of strangers who see each other as competitors?”
Family
When we read “The Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard” do we agree with the first laborers who grumbled at the landlord? Do we side with those who think the ones that worked all day should receive more than those who worked for only the last hour of the day? Does the situation offend our sense of justice and fairness? Why should the worker who worked only for an hour or two receive as much as the worker that had toiled the entire day?
The parable demonstrates to us just how far we have fallen from grace. Due to the stain of Original Sin, and the loss of sanctifying grace, we have forgotten how to see the world the way God sees it.
Author Robert DeMoor once related this story from his childhood.
“Back in Ontario when the apples ripened, Mom would sit all seven of us down, Dad included, with pans and paring knives until the mountain of fruit was reduced to neat rows of filled canning jars. She never bothered keeping track of how many we did, though the younger ones undoubtedly proved more of a nuisance than a help: cut fingers, squabbles over who got which pan, apple core fights. But when the job was done, the reward for everyone was the same: the largest chocolate-dipped cone money could buy. A stickler might argue it wasn’t quite fair since the older ones actually peeled apples. But I can’t remember anyone complaining about it. A family understands it operates under a different set of norms than a courtroom. In fact, when the store ran out of ice cream and my younger brother had to make do with a Pop-sicle, we felt sorry for him despite his lack of productivity (he’d eaten all the apples he’d peeled that day–both of them).”
It is said that frustration results when reality does not meet our expectations. Perhaps the real secret to internal peace is to adjust our expectations. Nothing disturbs our inner peace more than the thirst for recognition and esteem in the eyes of the world. Are we always comparing ourselves to others, competing with them for some imagined prize? The expectations that arise from that view of the world can lead to worries, envy, stress, anger, and uncertainty.
A recent study linked frequent use of social media with depression. As we read about the fabulous lives of our Facebook “friends” we find ourselves lacking. Feeling that we do not measure up to the achievements of others can lead to depression.
If this is the case then we need to readjust out thinking. When we compare ourselves to others we are often comparing the best traits of another to our own average or worst traits. Better by far is for us to focus on our own strengths and recognize what we have to offer is unique.
More than that, what we often see on social media is not always the truth. There is a recent video making the rounds that shows a young man’s reactions to the video his girlfriend is recording about her newfound lifestyle.
The girlfriend, not seen in the video but overheard, is describing the very rigid diet and exercise routine she has adopted and how wonderful she feels for doing so.
Her boyfriend, listening to this, is engaged in a symphony of eye-rolls, double takes, and at one point a spit-take that sends a very clear message that his girlfriend is being less than honest.
We cannot compare ourselves even to our very close friends whose lives we are intimately familiar with, how much less can we compare ourselves to social media “friends” whom we do not know?
Covenant
God relates to His people through covenants. Covenants create family. Matrimony is a covenant between two families. It takes two separate families and makes them into one large family.
Throughout our salvation history, beginning with our first parents in the garden, God has established a number of covenants with His people. With each covenant, the size of His family increases. The New Covenant, “covenant” is another word for “testament,” established though Jesus, offers to the entire world the opportunity to be part of God’s family, if we are willing to abide by the terms of the covenant. Every family has rules, even God’s.
So let us reexamine the parable of the workers in the vineyard through the eyes of a family, the eyes of love, the eyes of God.
Are we a family that cares for and supports each other? Or are we a group of strangers who see each other as competitors?
The ways of God are not our ways. His thoughts are not our thoughts. Jesus warns us that although each has been given a special role, one is not more important than another.
Look at a family run business. Are members of the family fed according to how much they worked the business that day? No, all are fed. All are loved.
This is perhaps a way to understand the justice of God. It is a justice founded upon love. Remember we are all brothers and sisters. We are all family. The gain of one is the gain of all just as the sorrow of one is the sorrow of all.
So for true peace of mind, think more of the glory of God than of self. Recognize His abundant generosity and love. Trust Him in all things.
Pax Vobiscum
25th Sunday in Ordinary Time